Kelp and Pinecones
by PierceTheVeils
Summary: When your on a scouting mission and lose your entire food supply to monsters, what is the only logical thing to do? Stop for cheeseburgers, of course! friendship!Percy/Thalia, done for the Capture the Flag Competition.


The small building was stocked to the brim with hungry customers, ready to eat their lunch. They were probably past capacity, but at the moment, Percy thought this was a good thing. Monsters wouldn't attack the two of them in front of too many mortals. They usually tried to lure you somewhere isolated to kill you.

But that still didn't explain why they'd stopped in In-N-Out, of all places.

"I can't believe this," Percy mumbled, mouth full of cheeseburger.

Thalia sat across from him, eating a meat patty of her own. She'd gotten a double cheeseburger, stuffed to the brim with greasy contents. "Why not?"

The demigod glanced around the restaurant. The place was full of patrons, hopefully mortal. "We're in a war, on a stakeout, and looking for an army of monsters and traitor demigods that could arrive at _any given moment_, and what is the Great Hunter Thalia's first words when we arrive on site?" he wiped his mouth with an already dirty napkin, "'Let's get cheeseburgers. I'm starving.'"

"Hey, it's not my fault you lost all our food supplies to an enemy scouting party." she reached across the table to steal one of his fries, then popped it in her mouth. "We needed to replenish our stock _somewhere_."

Percy snorted. "Somewhere that just happens to be your favorite fast food restaurant of all time? How convenient of me."

His traveling partner tried to shrug it off, but Thalia couldn't fight a mischievous smile. "Huh. I guess traveling with Kelp Brain _does _have some advantages," she took a drink of her soda. "And besides, even you have to admit In-N-Out has the best fries ever. How can you possibly be complaining?"

"Watch it, Pinecone Face," Percy teased. He stole a fry from her stack, much to Thalia's dismay. "You've just been traveling with a _boy _for two days, and now you're admitting it's _not_ unbearable in every way? What will Artemis think?"

The Hunter scoffed. "Oh please!" She picked up another cup of fries, one that meant for the rest of their stakeout team. She shook them in his face, "I would throw these at you if they weren't so good."

"Eh... the food here's okay, but I like Wendy's better." Percy explained. "They have a bigger menu, and their hamburgers come with more stuff on it. Here, they give you the bare minimum. Fries alone are _not_ enough to make up for this."

Her blue eyes widened. "What!" she flicked ketchup at Percy, which struck him right in the chest, despite him trying to dodge. "This place is way better than Wendy's! They make their fries by hand, their menu is way easier to understand, and you can actually get a lot more than you think, if one knows how to order."

Thalia smirked. "Unfortunately, I don't think a Kelp Brain could ever crack the code. They have to be told exactly what to get, like at your precious little _Wendy's._"

"You still can't argue that Wendy serves more food than In-N-Out does. Here, they only do burgers no matter _how_ you order. Wendy's also serves things like chicken sandwiches and Baconators."

"Ugh, who would possibly want chicken when they can get cheeseburgers?" Thalia grimaced. "Chicken is for chickens."

"I don't know what kind of chickens you've been coming across with the Hunters, but most _aren't_ cannibals," he replied. "And I still want my Baconator."

She laughed. "Fine! I don't see why you want it so much, but the next time we're traveling together to get to a stakeout, and you lose all our food to a small band of hungry monsters, we'll go to Wendy's to restock, assuming there's one in the area. Happy?"

"Fair enough," Percy sighed. Guzzling the last of his large Coke, he stood. "Alright, we should probably go find Annabeth, Grover, and whatever Hunter you appointed to this mission. They might send out a search party."

His partner nodded. "I'm just about finished anyway. Let's go, or they'll think we got in another fight."

"We don't fight that much, do we?"

Thalia shrugged. "Apparently so, though I don't see it," she paused, "Though if you hadn't left your post in Capture the Flag, we still would've won."

Percy shook his head. "You don't know that. All I did was I saw their flag and went for it. We wouldn't have even gotten close to a chance if I hadn't done it!"

"Prove it!"

"You prove yourself. Show me how Camp Half-Blood losing was all _my_ fault. How do you know the Hunters wouldn't have just won anyway?!"

Mortals were starting to stare. "Okay, maybe we _do_ fight this much." Thalia observed.

"Agreed," Percy ended, grabbing his pack. Thalia took the rest of the food, and they left In-N-Out right in the middle of rush hour. Lunch break was over.

**A/N: Hey, at least I _tried_ to be funny.  
**

**Alright, so I pretty much just slapped this fic together this afternoon. Probably shouldn't have waited until the due date to do this, but I was up until 2am last night working on another story, and I changed my pairing a couple days ago, so there's an excuse, somewhat.  
**

**This was done for the Capture the Flag Competition on PJFC, so it's only right that I mentioned Capture the Flag in my fanfiction. My original pairing was Hades and Persephone, but I'm not big on writing gods, so I got my pairing changed. Technically, they never said it had to be a _romantic _pairing, and Percy and Thalia are just so cute this way. Can anyone tell I'm hungry?  
**

**Oh, and special thanks to percabeth777, for helping me think through ideas, and to NERC, for creating this competition.**

**Anyhow, I hope everyone enjoys this cute little one shot! Tell me what you thought in a review, purple team for the win, and I'll see you on the far side!  
**


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